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💃 Scary Salesforce User Stories to Tell In the Dark 🕺

💃 Scary Salesforce User Stories to Tell In the Dark 🕺

SalesforceChaCha Halloween Special

Salesforce ChaCha
October 31, 2024 • Estimated Reading Time: 5 minutes

Good morning, Salesforce Nerds! Happy Halloween 🎃!

Halloween and Salesforce share a common thread. Here’s what we mean-

Halloween has epic tails of ghosts, creepy-crawlies, and the supernatural.

Scary stuff!

And guess what?!

Salesforce also has endless scary stories! Scary user stories 👻🎃💀.

The ChaCha loves scary, so enjoy this Halloween special -

SCARY USER STORIES 🫣

👻 Scary Salesforce User Stories To Tell in the Dark 🎃

🎃 Tertiary Lead Source

Scary user story: As a marketing manager, I need the ability to have a primary lead source, secondary lead source, and tertiary lead source fields.

Boo!: So this is basically a Category→Type→ Item structure that is common in enterprise ticket systems, but is massively overkill and complex for lead source attribution. And the ongoing maintenance and support for this….spooooky!

👻 The Original Scary Salesforce Story!

Scary user story: As a salesperson, I need the ability to rollback an Opportunity, Contact, Account, and Person Account to a Lead.

Boo!: the original scary user story….

🎃 The Admin-lite Profile

Scary user story: As an executive, or a user who is able to influence execs, I need a profile exactly like an admin, but I suppose not an official admin profile since your IT principles have rules against that 🙂

Boo!: Ah, the classic Admin-lite profile request. Which is more scary - what the user will do with their profile power or that their request was approved?!

👻 Mass Update

Scary user story: As a salesperson, I need the ability to mass update any field. Stage, owner, lead source, dates…..whatever I want.

Boo!: This should scare your data integrity score and validations and automations attached to those fields! Maybe put in your own ticket to create a “rollback anything that user did” button….

🎃 Proactive Existence Validation

Scary user story: As a salesperson, when im on the phone, I need the prospect to tell me they’re already in the system.

Boo!: This is a spooky approach to duplicate management! Is it hauntingly hard to search the CRM before you create a new record?

👻 WoW Reporting

Scary user story: As a user, I need the ability to create WoW, MoM, and YoY reporting.

Boo!: Very scary that Salesforce doesn’t have a native Week-over-Week reporting feature. When pattern recognition is legitimate superpower, not having a report to identify patterns is frightening 👻!

🎃 Full Moon and So Much More

Scary user story: As a salesperson, I need an automation that fires every other Thursday, when the First Name starts with a vowel, there’s a waning crescent moon, the lead owner is west of the Mississippi and the S&P500 is over 4500 but below 4999.

Boo!: There are conditions and then there are spooky scary conditions….

👻 Keep an Eye Out For These , Will Ya

Scary user story: As a sales manager, I need salespeople to be notified 21 days before a renewal date.

Boo!: This is a different kinda scary - that Salesforce doesn’t have out-of-the-box polling functionality. We get it - polling would be a huge spike in Salesforce’s internal platform processing. But it would also provide sales orgs valuable functionality!

🎃 Premium AI, but Free

Scary user story: As a user, I would like access to genAI features like marketing email content, case summaries and recommended next steps, and prospect sentiment scores. Since the company won’t pay for Einstein, then just “use Zapier to integrate with openAI and use our company data as the LLM.”

Boo!: This is scary ignorant on so many levels. But the truly scary thing is how Salesforce is pricing Einstein interactions. On top of the subscription fees, there is a $2 “per conversation” fee?! 💀

POLL